Of Missed Opportunities and Lessons Learned

This is a difficult day for writing. As I hear the sound of rain outside, it’s becoming unclear why this cold weather and smell of my favorite coffee are not helping me in organizing my thoughts. Well, I think I should remind myself that I am a writer and the most motivating force of all—the deadline—is just a few hours away.

Setting aside other deadlines I have and some of the work that needs my attention, let me tell you a story about one opportunity that I failed to seize.

Almost four years ago, I qualified in an exchange student in Japan. After the rigorous application and interview I’ve undergone, I finally received a call from UP Diliman telling me to prepare for my two-week stay abroad. Coincidentally, I am a representative of our school in a regional press conference that time.

I had to choose between the two. Back then, a lot of people tried to persuade me to back out of the writing competition and go on with the opportunity to be an exchange student in another country. However, what they didn’t know was I am weighing things between something I’ve long been waiting for and an experience that could possibly happen once in a person’s life.

To cut the story short, I chose to stay for the regional competition, and just like that, a big opportunity slipped away. 

****

I grew up in a family of policemen. My father is a retired Police Inspector and my eldest brother is a Police officer. Before my second eldest brother left for abroad, he also used to be a Police officer here in the city. Aside from my family members, I have some relatives working as policemen, too. This probably explains why my parents wanted me to become a lawyer.  I guess they want their youngest and only daughter to be in a profession also inclined with public service.

From elementary to high school, I’ve dreamt of becoming a doctor. I was intended to enroll as a Nursing student here in AUF, but just before my freshman year started, I had a serious conversation with my mother which influenced me to reconsider my decision.  

Disregarding my 10 year-old dream, I enrolled as an AB Communication student.

                                                  

Now that I am in my last year in this course, how sure am I in pursuing law after college? I still don’t know. I change my mind every month. There are too many things inside my head and none of these will really allow me to decide and settle. A part of me says I should explore the possibility of finding a job related to my degree, while at the back of my mind, a part of me says my parents must be right because they only know and want what’s best for me.

Whatever path I choose, I know that taking up this degree instead of pursuing my long-wanted dream is not a mistake. I didn’t miss even a single opportunity in this case. Had I not been brave enough to change track, I won’t be in the situation I am in right now.

The truth is, now that I am into communication, I could not imagine myself being in other courses. In choosing this degree, I met amazing persons whom later on became my closest friends. I was able to practice my journalistic skills by becoming a part of The Pioneer and I’ve been to places and experienced great things there. Most importantly, I was able to realize that I can do some things that I never thought I’d be able to do.

I have missed and let a number of opportunities pass. These opportunities might be represented by different faces, but it all boils down to one message—that there’s a reason why I backed off from these situations and that in the end, there’s nothing to lose.

I find it normal to sometimes wonder what might have happened if I grabbed every opportunity that presented itself to me. Despite of this, I still don’t regret a thing. Every missed opportunity taught me to be brave enough to risk and face the other countless possibilities available around me.

At the end of the day, I’ve got nothing to lose but more to gain.

Hindi Biro

Naisip ko lang bigla na ang dami ko na palang pinalagpas na malalaking oportunidad na dumating sa buhay ko. Ang dami ko na rin palang mga bagay na pinabayaang dumaan na lang. Ang dami na ring mga karanasan na kung sana’y pinili kong danasin, malamang hindi ako nagbabalik-tanaw ngayon at nag-iisip kung ano kayang nangyari kung hindi ako umayaw sa mga hamon ng pagkakataon.

Halos apat na taon na ang nakaraan mula nung matanggap ako sa isang ‘exchange student’ sa Japan. Hindi biro ang pinagdaaanan ko bago ako tuluyang makatanggap ng tawag mula sa Diliman na nagsasabing isa ako sa mapalad na dalawampung estudyante sa Pilipinas na ipapadala sa ibang bansa para pag-aralan ang kultura nito. Labis ang saya ko ng mga oras na iyon. Dala na rin ng pagiging isip bata, naisip ko noon na ang galing-galing ko dahil nagawa kong pumasa sa mahigpit na proseso ng pagpili ng mga delegado.

Totoong hindi biro ang proseso. Halos buong araw akong naghintay sa interbyung iyon kung saan pinakanta, pinasayaw, at pinagtatanong ako ng mga bagay patungkol sa personal na buhay at buhay-estudyante ko. Ilang buwan din akong naghintay ng tawag, at noong dumating na ang pinaka-aasam kong kumpirmasyon, inayawan ko rin. Pinili kong manatili na lang dito sa Pilipinas at makipagtunggali sa isang local na kompetisyon.

Marso 2009. Isa sa mga pinakahihintay na araw ng isang mag-aaral ay ang kanyang pagtatapos. Aaminin kong hinintay kong dumating rin iyon sa buhay  ko, ‘yun nga lamang, hindi ako dumalo. Maraming nag-iisip at nagtatanong kung anong dahilan bakit ko nagawa ‘yun. Alam kong may mga nainis din at nagalit sa akin. Anu’t ano pa man, hindi ako natatakot o nahihiya. Sa hindi ko pag-sipot, isang bagay ang napatunayan ko sa aking sarili—hindi ko man nagawang harapin ang katotohanan noon, nakaya ko namang magpakatatag sa kabila ng mga mapanuyang kritisismo at sabi-sabing ibinabato sa akin matapos kong hindi dumalo.

Iba’t-iba man ang mukha ng bawat pangyayaring pinalagpas ko, iisa pa rin naman ang mensaheng nais nitong iparating—na may dahilan sa bawat pagtalikod ko sa oportunidad at may mga taong mananatiling nandyan para sa akin hanggang sa huli. Bagamat nakapanghihinayang minsan, wala akong pinagsisisihan. Dahil ang bawat bagay na pinalampas ko ay tinulungan akong malaman kung sino ang mga totoong tao, at kung sino ang nagbabalat-kayo lamang.

Unfriend

I guess this is the right thing to do.


And by the way, I'm considering the possibility of deactivating my facebook account soon.

Putograft TV Commercial

Finally, I had the chance to upload this 29-second commercial we made for our TV Production last semester.

Enjoy watching! :)

The Other One

It’s been a while since I last updated my blogger account. I missed blogging, really. I’ve been too busy with some things and the hardest part is even if I want to write and put these feelings I have now into words, I just can’t.

At this point, I’m a bit worried because I might not be able to finish this post. This might just be counted as one of my drafts long piled up in this laptop. However, I’ll still try to continue and search for the right words to express what I really want to say—even if you don’t really care about this.

Lately, I can’t stop worrying about some things. In my entire life, I haven’t tried ruining relationships just for my own sake. I’m not that selfish. Even if I want to be happy, I don’t think other people’s sadness could bring me smiles.

I’m trying to make myself understand the situation. What I am doing now is plain feeble-mindedness. This is actually something that I promised myself that I won’t engage into. I am giving him reasons to be unfaithful at certain times. Instead of being guilty, there’s something in my head that says it’s alright to stay because I’m not doing anything to separate them.

How could I stop if I can’t find any reasons to do so? What if being in the vicious track is not enough for me to realize that I have to let go and get a life? I mean, he’s been good to me and he doesn’t want me to go as well. He’s also happy with me, and I am sure of that.

The fact that I’m here for him not just as a friend makes everything wrong…

STOP WHINING

            History tells us of one of the Caesars who prepared a great feast to which many were invited. At the appointed time, a great storm threatened and no one arrived. In anger with the “storm god,” Caesar had his soldiers shoot arrows into the sky for revenge. The shower of arrows fell back to earth to inflict injuries and shoot many people to death.

-         A.H. Stainback

I don’t know why but I can’t stand a complainer. I just don’t get it why some people can still manage to rant endlessly without thinking of ways to solve their problems. I’m not saying that I’ve never uttered any word of complaint against anything or anyone, but some people just can’t get enough of it, to the point that their negativity eats their whole being, making them stressed about their current situation.

I believe that if you have time to whine, then, you also have the time to do something about the things you’re complaining about. Many Filipinos never ran out of things to complain. Others blame the government because of their situation in life, while others throw chunks of negative comments about the status of our economy. We keep on ranting yet we don’t do anything about it. We complain about the trash, yet we do not clean our own or, at least, encourage others to clean theirs. Many people complain about our corrupt government, yet we elect the same politicians over and over. Some complain that our roads are dilapidated, yet they do not pay the right taxes.

Now, let us not think of general examples. Let us examine ourselves first, as students inside AUF.

I’ve heard complaints from my fellow students so many times. Some about the facilities, while others about the quality of education the university claims to have. The problem in these situations is some students choose to voice out their concerns inside the four corners of the classroom. They don’t consider the fact that the sentiments they have will not be acted upon unless these will be heard by the administration. Tendency is the problem is left unresolved and the complainers end up living their lives with the things they don’t like.

Nobody could exempt himself from experiencing stressors in his daily life. Complaining is something that is a bit difficult to eradicate among people because they consider this as their way of alleviating hard feelings. However, we should have realized that ranting only does little, and it doesn’t solve anything.

In the case of our country, what the Filipino people need to do is to stop diverting the blame to others. Accept the reality that there is an existing problem. Assume the responsibility and start thinking of concrete solutions and not incessant rants.

Meanwhile, if you are a complainer, make sure that through your venting, you come up with a solution. Address the problem to those who are concerned. Don’t be afraid to speak up especially if it concerns your welfare as a student or as a citizen of this country. Who knows? This could be the only way the government or the administration will pick up the hint and start acting.

We cannot change the situation through non-stop whining, but we can change our perspective towards the problem. Our complaints are like so many arrows shot into the sky—they will return someday, bringing harm to you and to other people as well.

* My article published in the Opinion Page of our university paper, The Pioneer, in its August – September 2011 Broadsheet issue.

Students okay higher grading standards

STUDENTS are not mad about this new grading system.

            Instead, like how Accountancy student Ramon Hizon finds it, it’s rather “harsh,” but would be the only way to enjoin students to do their responsibilities and study harder.

            College of Arts and Sciences (CAS) Dean Carmela Dizon said students need to exert more effort in their studies. Dizon said, the purpose of this change is to encourage students to study harder and persevere more in their academic standing, and to raise the academic standards of the university.

            Hizon agreed and said that “[the change on the grading system is] a great move for the betterment of educational quality in AUF.”

            Meanwhile, Electronics and Communication Engineering student Paolo Infante finds the change I the grading scheme “okay,” but only at first. Infante said he realized that the increase in the passing rate was a big thing when their preliminary grades were issued to them.

            Infante said there’s a “big possibility” for the scholars to lose their scholarships because they’re having a hard time reaching the new rate. Infante however accepted the change saying all they need is to exert more effort. But he remained with his earlier statement though when he said he’s sure that “hindi magiging madali ‘yon.”

           

            “Panibagong adjustment nanaman ‘to,” Infante ended.

           

            On the other hand, Dizon said, “kung hasa talaga sila, when they graduate they can face almost anything.”

            Dizon explained the change on the grading system was decided upon during the meeting of the academic council which is comprised of the deans of the different colleges, and the Vice President for Academic Affairs Archimedes David.

            “Napag-usapan ‘yan from top management tapos nag-cascade sa mga different offices,” according to Dizon.

            David said this is part of realizing the mission, vision, and goals of the university.

            “If you are going to visit the quality policy of the university, it calls for the continual improvement of programs, structure, and education system,” said the vice president.

            The idea of changing the grading scheme started during last year’s second semester. The new scheme is now effective this academic year and recognizes 60%, 65%, and 75% passing rates for general education, professional, and board subjects, respectively.

* My article published in the News Page of our university paper, The Pioneer, in its June – July 2011Tabloid issue.